Monday, May 2, 2011
Daily diabetic drama
My husband is a good actor, I have seen him on the stage in numerous musicals, always in the lead...so I know he can act...but I don't think he's acting when he sits in a chair the entire day, only getting up to go to the bathroom and get something to eat, in between my bringing him something to eat. Is he that tired??? I came downstairs this morning to the living room in disarray...was he so tired from sitting all day that he couldn't at least fold the blankets and make the room look more presentable??? It seems like a little thing... he can't entertain washing dishes because he can't stand long...so okay I will do all dishes all the time...but fold a blanket??? oh well...seems small compared to other things to complain about...it is just that it is what it is...and sometimes a little thing gets to me in a BIG way.
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It always seems to be the little things that drive me the craziest.
ReplyDeleteFor the big things we get help from adrenaline. The little things we have to handle all on our own: Day after day after day...
It's good to vent.
S
I come home to many "little things" every day: coffee on the counter/cupboards/floor, dirty dishes, cat and dog toys all over the place to trip on . . . I could go on and on. Does it drive me crazy? You betcha! Will it go away anytime soon? I'm not holding my breath!
ReplyDeleteHang in there,
Lilly
Little things add up
ReplyDeletebig things explode
think about when we hear what the politicians talk about - they can't the voters to react to little changes each year -- they create great big things to get attention
but all of a sudden, after years of neglecting all of those little things -- we have a gigantic budget deficit that no one knows how to address.
Just my grumpy show of support for you today.
You are terrific.
You ladies make me smile and feel loved and understood. We GET each other. It sometimes feels like we have a dependent child in the form of a grown man to care for...LOL...not funny but laughter lightens the load...we love them...that's why we do it. Am I right? Can I hear an AMEN???
ReplyDeleteAmen!
ReplyDeleteI think I have signed up to join this group but I'm not sure. I got a confirmation that I am in the Type 2 Diabetes support group on Daily Strength, but that doesn't seem to be the same as you all who are married to diabetics.
ReplyDeleteMy husband was recently diagnosed. We knew it was coming; he is about 100 lbs overweight and food is his drug of choice. Diabetes runs in his family. Now that he has been diagnosed (and had NOT modified his food choices, fusses if I buy sugar-free sodas, for example) and has not lost weight as ordered to my our doctor, he will not go to our doctor for ANYTHING (including illness) for fear of being fussed at.
I have tried fixing appropriate "portion-controlled" and balanced meals. He will eat them, and then get up and fix himself 3 or 4 slices of garlic bread, maybe have some crackers and cheese, and (since he can't find anything else) have a drink of Crystal Lite lemonade. The supper I fixed was simply NOT enough food. He cannot comprehend (though he is NOT stupid) that he must learn to decrease his food intake.
Fortunately, he is not belligerent or abusive. He is, in fact, one of the kindest, sweetest guys I have ever known. I want to hang on to him! But how do I do that when he is his own worst enemy?
Is he on medications? I have found finally after years and years since mine was diagnosed that if the meds aren't regulated that seems to make them crave more and more food...I went through everything you wrote about. I hear ya...so frustrating...Mine seemed to have an awakening in the ER with over 600 reading and dizzy and disoriented...so, close to in a coma seemed to help him realize he was in big trouble BUT that was two years ago and before that it had been over twenty years he'd been "managing" (lol) diabetes.
ReplyDeleteIt is almost like they have to have a BIG scare to GET IT...What he craves is probably stronger or more meds and maybe even insulin...we know it is not that they need more food...if you can encourage him to forget about white bread, white rice, sugar, sugary snacks that is a start...but I know how hard it is...for us, I gave up candy and desserts and a whole lot of substances since I was diagnosed with Hashimoto's disease and that has helped...but even so I don't eat the stuff but he does now and then...TIME TO PULL THE HAIR OUT!!!!! Glad to have you here. HUGS and LOVE
Thank you, Lynn. He is not on any medications yet. He was recently diagnosed with an initial reading of 137. He does not have a monitor (and I'm not sure he would use it f he had one.) I think "denial" works better for him. (As in, "If I just ignore it hard enough, it will go away.)
ReplyDeleteOur doctor said blithely "Just lose 75-80 lbs and you should be fine." This would almost certainly be true for a normal person.
But this guy is an ambulatory appetite. He cannot seem to stop with a single serving of anything. At the last family buffet-type get-together, DH was the only person who MOUNDED food on his plate the first time, and then went back and did it again. Everyone else just ate normal servings. The adult kids all know he has diabetes. They look at him with disgust because he will not make any attempt to control his appetite. He doesn't even seem to realize what he is doing.
On the rare occasions that he does eat a normally portioned meal, within an hour, he is "starving" and starts rummaging around in cupboards.
He will not consider "lap band" or any kind of surgery that would physically prevent him from ingesting too much food. I'm simply OUT of creative approaches.
I am at a loss at the moment when it comes to diabetes, BUT I do know about food intolerances and craving food when you really aren't hungry but you feel you NEED something. Would he be open to eliminating known allergens? Just a thought...I used to be so out of control with chocolate and sweets it was like i was an alcoholic.
ReplyDeleteHaving said that, I do remember when my husband wasn't on meds yet and he would eat gross amounts of food like what you describe. Can you reason with him that IF he does not cut his food consumption down he WILL be on meds?
Does he drink much water???
I feel for ya...reminds me of years ago before Tom started on meds. GOOD LUCK! HUGS